Helps you reach a feel-good state of being
How often do you check in with yourself and focus on your mental and emotional functioning?
How often do you think about seeking professional help to reach a sense of mental health
And, last question: How often do you think about seeking professional help so you can maintain your mental health and wellness–a feel-good state of being in the world; sort of like preventative health care?
While the notion of mental health is not new, it has existed in eastern philosophies for many decades plus COVID-19, or what I like to call “COVID-OnGoing,” has certainly put it more on our radar, as well as, recent socio-political topics. But it still remains relatively unfamiliar to many people, communities and generations. It certainly isn’t talked about much amongst my Punjabi community although we are very much impacted by all the pressures the world at large faces i.e. financial stress, marital strain, family conflicts, parenting woes, growing up challenges and navigating our social/political worlds.
Helps you grow
So when I come back to the idea of mental health services, even more unfamiliar is the notion of seeking professional help (like going to therapy) to foster growth, self awareness, self reflection–all those things that help us understand who we are–who I am and what my needs are. Even communities from eastern worlds, don’t really adopt this mindset in their daily lives. Because let’s face it, everyone is busy and who has the time or money…or time! BUT if we stop and ask: am I satisfied with my current lifestyle, am I living the life I want to live? The short answer is: very few people are saying “Yes.”
There are many stressors that put pressures on us from the outside and inside causing pain. Then there are pressures that we carry decade after decade and generation after generation that get us stuck in a rut. For example, we Punjabis’ continue to: force a lifestyle upon one another that no one wants, have high needs and unreasonable expectations but take little action to show appreciation, and we tend to sweep serious traumatic events “under the rug” because we don’t know how to talk about it or we don’t know how to work through conflict without fighting or disconnecting. And YES! These are issues that plague many families and many communities, if not all of them.
Goes where Friends, Family and Faith Does Not
This is not to say there are not tools that help us to buffer the tensions we experience. Usually we mingle with our friends as a form of distraction or a way to process our struggles. We turn to our family for a sense of belongingness and connection. We dive into our work to have purpose. Or we retreat into our religious and spiritual faith systems, or any belief system, that helps bring some order and calm into our lives. But there can be times when these very tools become sources of distress and suffering.
This is when therapy may be most needed and most helpful. Mental health providers receive specialized training in understanding human functioning and what things can get stuck that cause you emotional pain and suffering. Therefore they can assist you in understanding the causes of your distress, identify the driving forces that prolong the suffering, and help you make the changes you desire in a strategic and planned manner.
Therapy is one tool
Beyond the technical and clinical aspects, therapy offers you a space to say all the things you are feeling, thinking and doing (depending on how honest and transparent you choose to be with yourself and with your therapist) to someone who is objective and neutral. You can work through your inner conflicts without worries about how what you are saying is impacting them. The therapist, though very caring and concerned about you, does not come with all the strings attached that family members and/or friends may come with. And you typically do not have to worry about judgment or criticism for feeling, thinking and saying the things you are discussing. In fact, you can say what you want to say, in whatever way you need to say it without feeling obligated to be politically or culturally correct. Therapy offers a guided exploration of your troubles and pathways for making the changes you desire that are rooted in psychological theories and research–this is what sets it apart from the advice or solace of friends, family or faith systems. This is not to say, it is more or less effective but instead, it is one tool that can help you understand your -self and what your needs are.
